The Story of a Sex Worker

January 10, 2005

The Spiral

I arrived at Ram Baker's house and found everybody looking at me suspiciously. Some looks were even hateful. Ram Baker usually looked like that because he was basically an asshole but these stares seemed worse than usual. I tapped a girl named Miranda Rights on the shoulder and she shrugged away and scowled.

I went upstairs to find Bernard. I found him in Ram's bedroom. Even Bernard looked at me skeptically.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"I've got some bad news," he said.

"What is it?"

"There's a rumor going around."

"What rumor?"

"A rumor that you're sick."


He took in a breath. "The rumor says that you have AIDS."

"My God, why?"

"I don't know. Do you have it?"

"No. I don't. Even you believe it?"

"I don't know. I don't know what to think. I got here today and Ram told me about the word that's going around."

He looked at me pityingly, as if I really were sick.

"Bernard, I'm not sick. It's a lie."

"I don't know if that matters, Shirl. This is serious. People are believing it. Just the thought is making people nervous."

"But it's not true."

"Do you know anyone who would want to spread this kind of thing?"

I thought of Andrew and was briefly fearful but I knew he wouldn't do something like that. First off, he wouldn't know who to call. But more importantly, I believed it wasn't in his character.

I didn't have to think too long before I considered Al Harvey. He was just that kind of evil. I didn't tell Bernard because I didn't know what to do with the information. Telling Bernard might set Al off further. He could be capable of more.

"I've got to tell people it's not true," I said.

"Well, you can try, Shirl. But people are fickle in this business. I have a feeling that even if you tell them the truth they're still going to be scared of you."

"What, so you think it's over?"

"I'll do my best to try and turn people around. But people are scared."

Bernard was right. The information spiraled. It didn't take two days but soon everybody seemed to know. When I told the truth, people looked at me bitterly. They thought I was lying to save face. I told them I'd tested negative but even that didn't work. They didn't want to take the chance. At times I started to believe that I really did have the disease because in everybody's eyes I did. Their collective belief was its own kind of sickness. Some people believed that I was healthy, like Bernard, but they were in the minority. Bernard pitied me, which didn't help my situation, but at least he was supportive. But he was busy with a lot of girls and a lot more films to direct so he couldn't give me all his time. I was left alone to fight it out myself. I lost. The looks of skepticism never went away.

There were enough girls that it wasn't the biggest loss to the industry if I never worked again. People didn't want to take the chance on me. New girls arrived everyday. There were enough pretty and willing girls to last ten lifetimes.

My new family had let me down. They didn't turn out to be that much more reliable than my natural family. Everybody's sudden indifference to me was shattering. I was too broken and demoralized to fight. I had an urge to flee the business much as I wanted run away from home at fifteen.


  • At 12:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Wow, now for something on the light side......

  • At 5:40 PM, Blogger Garrison Steelle said…

    And how long ago did this happen?


  • At 6:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Its made up it didn't happen at all.

  • At 7:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This is made up.

    "Shirley" up till this time had a captive audience,
    unfortunately he/she (blatantly) decided to use the recent events in the Adult Movie business (the AIDS Scare) as a cheap tool to continue the Farce.

    you need look no farther than the Stereotypical I'm a Adult Entertainer trying to have a "Normal" Relationship" blog entries. I'm just surprised she didnt start the whole thing with, "I got into Stripping to pay my way through College".

    this is the same kind of cheap story telling we'd expect from a FOX Sitcom, also called Jumping the Shark, ex : (In anouncer voice) "Tonight on a Very Special Married with Children, Kelly learns she's adopted". lol

  • At 6:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    so what if it's fiction? the question is whether it is entertaining fiction. to quote the beastie boys: and if you don't like it, then - hey - f*ck you.

  • At 10:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    my guess is that 80-90 percent of sex blogging is fiction. so who cares if its fiction or not. what's that old saying, believe nothing you read or hear and half of what you see.

  • At 4:46 PM, Blogger darling maggot said…

    well we now know she didn't work for vivid, cos they are all condoms-only. could shirl be an anabolic girl? ooh. the plot thickens. gaping internal anal cumshots might just lie in this blog's future.

    just kidding, shirl. i hope you get a pr person, sorts it out for you. you're a good writer. if you don't make money shooting porn anymore, you'll make it selling print, i promise.

  • At 2:34 AM, Blogger Bogger said…

    The Plot thickens.
    I reckon it was Al Harvey who is dishing the dirt.
    The qustion is, why?
    Did Shirley use a condom when she shagged Al?
    Has Al got AIDS?
    Why doesn't Bernard do anything?
    Why hasn't anyone mentioned sheep, DPs, ATMs or Bukkaake?
    All this and more will be answered in next weeks exciting episode...

  • At 11:04 AM, Blogger Red Bunny said…

    You guys are so suspicious! Has it occurred to you that there must be some truth to stereotypes - that if there are AIDs scares, someone must actually be a porn star dealing with the issue? I'm a college student working in a brothel on my semester off - I don't know if it gets any more stereotypical than that - but I assure you I wouldn't be wasting my time making it up, either. Shirley is telling her story in retrospect, so of course it sounds more pat than a spur-of-the-moment blog. Have a little faith.

  • At 6:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I agree that this blog has "jumped the shark" with this post. It's clearly that the author is tiring of writing this and has invented the AIDS plotline to wrap it up.

  • At 4:36 PM, Anonymous TheRottenLady said…

    Well (if this is true), can't you just clear this all up with an HIV test?


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